Pneumonia is Hard

Neighbors, our first responders did sign up for this, and are well and continually trained, including natural compassion. Call when you need them.

I have been as ill with this pneumonia as I was with Covid last fall. I almost called our first responders a few nights ago at 2:30 a.m., but didn’t want to bother them. At the same time, I knew that was irrational thinking from my high fever, rigors, and erratic heart rate.

I did necessarily go to E.R. for several hours the next day, got wonderful care at Unity Health, witnessed infinite patience and compassion as staff faced all manner of extreme cases arrive. We agreed I would go home and keep in close contact with our medical team.

Now I am on the healing side, thanks be to God’s mercy and a just-right-for-me husband (aka caregiver).

Be Encouraged, Take Heart

Our focus belongs on God’s steadfast love and mercy, rather than the ever-changing values and troubles of society and the world.  It can be hard sometimes, especially when those near us devalue your faith.  Take heart, you are in excellent company.

“You should know this, Timothy, that in the last days there will be very difficult times. For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. They will be unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. They will betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that!”     — II Timothy 3:1 – 5

Unwell?

It seems like bad things happen at the worst times possible, physical or financial, just when we have so much planned!  Sometimes, we are not just told to cut back a bit and do less, but we feel like we’re been completely shut down from doing anything productive or useful.  It’s frustrating, disappointing, disheartening, we get jealous of others who can do or go more, we feel left out, misunderstood, pitied by others, etc.

It feels crummy.

I have learned some gritty lessons from seriously ill patients, as well as others with devastating financial problems, and endless and excessive family/work demands.  I even learned a lot from my own experience with a badly broken leg  – bedridden, off work, then wheelchair-bound, etc. for several weeks, and experiencing unexpected depression.

One of the things I’ve learned in my chaplaincy visits, when I stop trying to fix their issues, I can hear them better.  We can both hear God better too!

When people lose the ability to physically do the things they want, some grow in peace, grace and wisdom – after an initial adjustment period.  Priorities get adjusted, humility develops (replacing the POISON of resentment) and perspective changes.  In some cases, it’s a relief to have to let go of some things that really are unrealistic even when in full health.  Facing and accepting our limitations can be a hard pill to swallow, but it’s unsafe and unhealthy to not receive that medicine.

Time is limited and incredibly valuable – for all of us.  That crazy feeling running train of thought for all the things we need (or want) to do seems never ending.  When sidelined, quiet down a bit, turn to God and can hear Him better.  It helps. 

When I visit with people in hospice, they sometimes feel lost, especially unable to do for themselves or others.  But listen to them, their thoughts and words are even more precious and frequently filled with wisdom.

Offer the best gift, your time, listen, really hear their heart words.  Make time.  It matters.

Peace be with your spirit, in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit!

Holiday Sadness – Oxymoron?

Pain is often more pronounced during any holiday season.  Be sensitive to people you know, listen more than talk, really hear and care – without criticizing or insisting that they’re wrong, or offering unsolicited advice.  We can do better, be better, caring about difficult people, the ones who make us feel uncomfortable.  Take time to care, in ways they need most.

Ask God to open your eyes and ears to those who need you.  Loan them your faith, through your presence, if you can.  Grace and peace.

Fickle Faith

We exclaim, “God is awesome” or “God is good”, when things go our way or prayer is answered in the way we want.  How many of us say those same things when we’re in the middle of pain or despair?  Do we still think He is awesome or good?

Do we still thank God or praise Him when we are sad, or our prayers for help aren’t answered the way we want?  Are we just fair weather friends to God?  Is God only a fair weather Friend to you?

Jesus loved us first, while we were yet sinners.  That is amazing.  Grace and peace.

Cancer. Again.

If you’re dealing with cancer – either your own or someone you love, do not feel obligated to hide or “handle it” perfectly.

In my chaplain role, oncology patients have taught me so much.  One spunky, very ill, older woman said she had so much cancer in her family that she always knew without a doubt that her turn would come to battle it.  She already studied a lot on the subject, to help support family members.  She felt well-prepared for the time when it knocked on her own door.

She told me that when it actually happened to her, she realized she wasn’t as “good” at cancer as she thought she would be – it turned her world upside down and she had a much harder time emotionally than she expected to.  She ended up with the same fears, devastating thoughts and initial hopelessness that she saw in others.

Another woman I spoke with said the worst for her was losing her hair, no matter how perfect her wig was.  She didn’t feel like a woman anymore.  Another woman didn’t care so much about the hair stuff, but she could barely deal with losing a breast, and now she was losing the second one.   One man was sure his wife would not love him anymore, but would only stay with him out of obligation, hoping to find a “whole” man after he passed.

This cancer monster is so diverse and sneaky in the way it attacks each person!  It attacks ones psyche, spirit and body.  It finds each person’s own unique vulnerabilities and attacks.

If you are in a place where you can hear this, take heart and have full confidence in the presence of God in every aspect of your life.  Even cancer.  This is really hard.  You are a whole person, who happens to have cancer.  At times you may feel consumed by it, defined by it, in ways no one else can know.

Please know at least this one thing, beloved, God does care and will never leave you.  You are not alone, even in those dark quiet moments, when anguish washes over you.  God’s Holy Spirit accompanies each of us into our most personal battles, even the ones where we feel so alone and abandoned – He IS with you now and every tomorrow.

Peace be with your spirit,  RevDonnaH